28 June 2015

Our Pet Lobster Geoff...

Did I ever tell you about the time I had a pet lobster? Well, if I didn't I'll tell you now. I hope you are sitting comfortably.

Once upon a time, a fisherman gave me a lobster. He gave it to me in the playground at school, when I was picking up the kids. I didn't really know this man but I thought it was very nice of him to give me a lobster. They are quite expensive and posh aren't they?

Anyway, in my naivety, I thought it was ready to cook, and was possibly even in one of those freeze dried bags, ready to pierce and ping in the microwave. Imagine my shock, when I got home, opened the bag and saw a very much alive lobster looking back at me. 

The lobster only had one arm, and it was taped up. I instantly felt bad for the lobster, and he did look a bit sad, so I took his tape off and let him have a walk around the kitchen. The kids thought it was hilarious that we had a 'pet lobster' waving his hand at them, walking around the kitchen. They decided to call him 'Geoff'. 

Later on that evening, when the kids had gone to bed, I thought I had better cook Geoff. I chased him around the kitchen for a bit, but he started to get all 'gangsta' and tried to 'pinch' me.

If I'm honest, I felt half petrified and half very attached to Geoff by this point. There was no way I could ever cook him.

After a few days, we decided the best thing to do was let Geoff go back in the sea (but never ever tell the fisherman.) We took him to our local beach and said our farewells to Geoff. He was now 'Geoff-free' / 'Geoffrey' - geddit!?!

The only problem was, because of his one arm, he kept swimming in circles and kept coming back to shore. It took about half an hour and one final massive 'lobster throw', to see him swim away into the night..... 

BYE GEOFF! Wherever you are we hope you are happy!

This is the end of my pet lobster story. Or as they say in France.....'FIN'. Xx